Dear denizens of Gaudiya Repercussions;

Look, let me get something straight here. I'm only speaking for myself. I've just learned something about myself. Whatever my explorations, that is my gig. It doesn't matter, whether I am hallucinating, loving, fighting, reasoning out, on some platform, my own understandings. I made a needless hurt. I'm not talking about blasphemy, I'm talking about hurting someone with my words. If someone loves someone, what little effort is it for me to respect that. It will not further my understanding to speak roughly of someone's beloved or Beloved. I have no proof that God is indifferent, just as I have no proof, FOR MYSELF, that God is merciful. That is beyond my ken right now.

But I do have real friends here, and whatever my opinion or doubt or what, I don't need to hurt you about it. This is between me and the universe. I can simply honour you. We can go on writing until the cows come home. Please accept my apology. It is not LYING, for me to say, that some of you have a relationship with something or someone that I cannot enter into. I have my quarrel with all that is. So what. Between US, I don't want hurt. I can keep my integrity, whatever that is, and honour you also. It costs me nothing to do so, whereas it costs me a great deal, to see you dismayed. Everything that really was, still is.

Fond regards
Way apres, Laulyam

Roger that, Meta. Namaste. When do the cows come home, anyway?

When they hear the sound of Krishna's flute.

Maybe these will cheer you up:

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Stole these from the myFarm forum on Facebook (where I have farms with crops, cows, goats, fruit trees, barns and houses).