KC Wheelchair Santa Hustle, from "The Evolution of a CRO-MAGnon" Options

[Kalisurfer]

An excerpt from a book by John "Bloodclot" Joseph titled “The Evolution of a CRO-MAGnon." John was and is a member of the hard-core 80's punk band, The Cro-Mags, and he discusses his experiences with ISKCON during the eighties.


THE HARE KRSNA WHEELCHAIR SANTA HUSTLE
(from the book “The Evolution of a CRO-MAGnon)
__________________________________________

First off, I have to admit that necessity became the mother of invention on this character that I helped create. Allow me to, as we say on the streets, "Break it down for ya." The bogus leaders of the Hare Krsna movement weren't the kind of people who wasted time, especially when it came to making money. In other words, while The Salvation Army and the other groups waited until after Thanksgiving to send their Santas on the streets, these guys had us out there in late October to get a jump on things. That's because all throughout ISKCON in every temple all over the world, November marked the beginning of "The Christmas Marathon," which by the way doesn't involve running, except occasionally from the cops.

Now, instead of pitting devotee against devotee in your local temple, it became a global competition to see who could collect the most money and give out the most books. Although they tried to make it look like the books were the real emphasis, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what it was all about. Like the Wu-Tang Clan said, "Cash Rules Everything Around Me… C.R.E.A.M. get the money, dolla' dolla' bill, y'all!"

Most of the leaders could care less about helping anyone get out of their suffering material condition by giving them spiritual knowledge. It was all about the C.R.E.A.M. baby, and the reason I know that is because a lot of that money we collected found its way into the secret bank accounts they set up all over the world. One so-called guru even spent $10,000 to buy his gay lover a Persian rug for them to have sex on in the Trump Towers, while "Bank Account Swami" (Ramapada), who's nothing more than a crook, had and still operates a loan-sharking business. His scheme involves hustling money from the temples and his disciples, then lending it back to them at astronomical interest rates. Nice gig, huh?

What they set up in the Hare Krsna Movement around the world is still going on as we speak. It's a type of pyramid scheme where the guys at the top of the pyramid (gurus and senior devotees) profit from all the hard work done by the guys operating on the bottom. The only reason some of these cats at the bottom stay in the movement is because they hope to one day reach the top and exploit the others now at the bottom. I know for a fact that the temple president in New York opened a recording studio after his fall from grace in the '80s. His cohort Vakresvara Pandit (from Puerto Rico... dude gets around right?) bought sports cars, guns and condos in Virginia with the money he stole and got from Bank Account Swami. Believe me, I haven't even begun to scratch the surface because hundreds of millions of dollars have been stolen in the last twenty-five or so years, all of which was tax free! Their current money making scheme (which is making them a killing) is selling green cards to people from India trying to get in the country. See, religions can get them in on religious visas and get the ball rolling. I just hope an Al Qaeda terrorist doesn't figure that one out. Now that you know just a little of what was going on behind the scenes with the money we collected, all unbeknownst to us of course, you'll really get a sense of how we were being hustled. That's why, as of late, the temples all over the world (except those in Poland because they're a little slow to catch on) are pretty much empty. The rigorous collection schedules burnt everyone out.

In New York, The Christmas Marathon was an all out effort, where seventy devotees worked for a month and a half straight. If you didn't work the streets, you had better be part of the support team which cooked, cleaned, did laundry or whatever else needed to get done for those who were pounding the pavement. I heard through the grapevine right before the marathon started that you could really rack-up out there as Santa Claus. Since there were no events in the area for the Sticker Pick I decided to give it a try. They had me go out to the strip malls on Sunrise Highway on Long Island and people just didn't want to see no motherf*ckin' Santa Claus' in October. Cars honked their horns and people screamed, "Hey asshole, you're two months early!" Storeowners threw me out and told me not to come back. It was so brutal out there that some kids even egged me.

But, being the persistent monk I was, I never gave up. My rebuttal to the storeowners became "We had a lot of backed up orders at the North Pole, so we had to start early this year." They obviously found it funny because it started to pay off in large dividends. My donations went from a $100-a-day to $200 then $300, then $500 and before I knew, it was the middle of November. I was in full swing on the marathon and then the Indian summer hit. For three straight days temperatures soared into the 70s and I baked out there in that red Santa suit and white beard and wig combination. By the fourth day, I had the worst jock itch and rashes running up and down my legs from sweating profusely while I walked the five to six miles collecting donations. To make matters worse, the knee I hurt while I was in the Navy swelled to the size of a small grapefruit. I couldn't walk and just when it seemed like my gig was up and my marathon over, our resourceful Pick Leader told me, "You can't walk, no problem. Here's a motorized electric wheelchair! You can go work the lots in Staten Island as an invalid."

____________________________________________________

The rest of the chapter can be read at:

THE HARE KRSNA WHEELCHAIR SANTA HUSTLE

[metamorphosis]

some temples i have known have "Twisty Balloon Clown Sankirtana" very spiritual, and beautiful.

[zanardi]

Oops!

[Dhyana]

The only reason some of these cats at the bottom stay in the movement is because they hope to one day reach the top and exploit the others now at the bottom.

Without doubting his facts, I am wondering what kind of local community he had joined, if he thinks the devotees' only motivation was as above.

[zanardi]

The only reason some of these cats at the bottom stay in the movement is because they hope to one day reach the top and exploit the others now at the bottom.

Without doubting his facts, I am wondering what kind of local community he had joined, if he thinks the devotees' only motivation was as above.

He himself seemed to be very forward and eager to advance in his endeavours....

[Kalisurfer]

The only reason some of these cats at the bottom stay in the movement is because they hope to one day reach the top and exploit the others now at the bottom.

Without doubting his facts, I am wondering what kind of local community he had joined, if he thinks the devotees' only motivation was as above.

From his writings and the inclusion of the name Ramapada Swami, it would most likely be New York City. I remember the Cro-mags staying at our temple in Washington D.C. when they performed in the area back in the early 80's. They came across as pretty quiet guys around devotees as opposed to the hard-core persona's they had on stage. They liked the philosophy to an extent, but never really joined up in terms of getting initiated. As usual, a Sannyasi or Senior ISKCOnite would attach themselves to being their friend in order to preach and reach younger people, as was done with the band Shelter, and no doubt they were used in that way. John Joseph was an independent wild child and was not about to be under the authority of any leaders back then.

From what I have read about him, he is now a big supporter of the IRM (ISKCON Reform Movement) movement and raises money for their cause, which is ironic due to their rather conservative fundamentalist viewpoints that would most likely find much fault with his lifestyle. He is into all kinds of conspiracy theories about who controls the world and ISKCON. An interesting creative person by all means, but I can't help but feel he has taken some creative license in the story about the KC wheelchair Santa.

[Strange Pilgrim]

conspiracy theories about who controls the world and ISKCON.

Does he propose that the controllers of the world (Illmuminati, Cryptocacy, CIA-MI6-Mossad, NWO Zionist maniacs, etc, whatever name you want to give the network) are the same people who control ISKCON?

The reason I ask is because when I lived in Puri in the late 90's, the local Indians looked on the ISKCON people there with great suspicion because they were convinced we were all CIA agents. At the time I thought this was utterly preposterous. But now, after so much has been publicly revealed about so-called intelligence agents infiltrating alternate religious groups and cults, rising to positions of authority in them, and then using them as bases of operations and to study social engineering and psychological persuasion techniques, etc, I've actually come to wonder if there was some merit to their accusations. It would certainly explain the egregious criminality, irreligiosity, and tight, fraternal protection network of so many of ISKCON's "leaders". The worldwide scope and connectedness of the temples would offer an ideal environment for intelligence networking. It answers a lot of otherwise unanswerable questions (such as why was Prabhupada murdered, and by whom?).

Any comments?

[Dhyana]

Just one, Hanlon's Razor:

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

[Kalisurfer]

Just one, Hanlon's Razor:

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

[Kalisurfer]

conspiracy theories about who controls the world and ISKCON.

Does he propose that the controllers of the world (Illmuminati, Cryptocacy, CIA-MI6-Mossad, NWO Zionist maniacs, etc, whatever name you want to give the network) are the same people who control ISKCON?

I don't know enough about him to personally to know if he thinks any of the groups you mention ever infiltrated ISKCON. Since he supports the IRM philosophy of bogus guru's and the need to reform ISKCON to their fundamentalist principles, then the only conspiracies about KC he supports may exist within that framework.

The reason I ask is because when I lived in Puri in the late 90's, the local Indians looked on the ISKCON people there with great suspicion because they were convinced we were all CIA agents. At the time I thought this was utterly preposterous.

I've heard of these rumors too, but outside of perhaps staying at a temple for a few days or a week, I can't see anyone following the devotee regime that could lead to initiation for very long if they did not believe in it. The dysfunctional temple structure was hard enough for people who were sincere, for a non-believer on a mission of espionage, it would almost seem like an unlikely set of austerities to go through just to have a alibi to be legally in India. There are so many other groups to be a part of that would not impose such heavy lifestyle changes in order to put on a false front of legitimacy.

Knowing how paranoid Richard Nixon was in the sixties, not to mention J. Edgar Hoover and the FBI, I am sure they checked out numerous alternative religions in hope of finding any radical leftist threats or commie infiltration, but to think that they stayed very long seems hard to buy.

But now, after so much has been publicly revealed about so-called intelligence agents infiltrating alternate religious groups and cults, rising to positions of authority in them, and then using them as bases of operations and to study social engineering and psychological persuasion techniques, etc,

You mentioned revelations of intelligence agents infiltrating religious groups and cults and raising to authority positions...is there any sources that this info is based on, for I'd love to read about it...thanks.

I've actually come to wonder if there was some merit to their accusations. It would certainly explain the egregious criminality, irreligiosity, and tight, fraternal protection network of so many of ISKCON's "leaders". The worldwide scope and connectedness of the temples would offer an ideal environment for intelligence networking. It answers a lot of otherwise unanswerable questions (such as why was Prabhupada murdered, and by whom?).

The fall of ISKCON and it's leadership, with all the historical stories of angst that are still coming out, seems to be more in line of naïve inexperienced incompetancy mixed with power and prestige that corrupted people who may have had good intentions coming in. Criminality, irreligiousity and fraternal protection seems to exist to one degree or another in all large spiritual institutions and seems to be part of human nature, especially when it involves unquestionable authority figures who are living embodiments of God.

The idea that it was all due to outside conspiratorial dark forces makes for more compelling thought that borders on the type of fun one gets from reading a good mystery novel, but unless someone steps forward with any kind of proof, I have deep doubts that such things took place.

[Strange Pilgrim]

But now, after so much has been publicly revealed about so-called intelligence agents infiltrating alternate religious groups and cults, rising to positions of authority in them, and then using them as bases of operations and to study social engineering and psychological persuasion techniques, etc,

You mentioned revelations of intelligence agents infiltrating religious groups and cults and raising to authority positions...is there any sources that this info is based on, for I'd love to read about it...thanks.

I first read about it in Jim Keith's book "Mind Control, World Control", in his chapter "Creating Cults". Michael Collins Piper touched on it in his book, "The Judas Goats". Neither of them mention ISKCON.

[Gerard]

There is also the possibility that practicing a religious method brings out some really bad traits in people; there are many pitfalls in spiritual life when there is no proper guidance based on insights, realizations and self-knowledge, as in Iskcon and SCS Math.

A few examples:

* to become so exalted that one forms an impossible dream of a perfect life;
* to become overzealous and then we may begin to criticize others and be lacking in basic human love;
* discover how many "mistakes" one has been making up to now, and one's natural desire is to be "correct." In the beginning one is probably going to be too artificially "strict" and make many new mistakes out of pride;
* becoming filled with the spirit of inflated self-esteem.]

For the esoterically-inclined Rudolf Steiner's "Welche bedeutung hat die okkulte Entwickelung des Menschen für seine Hülle (physisischer Leib, Aetherleib, Astralleib) und sein Selbst?" GA 145. [Effects of Occult Development on the Self and on the Sheaths of Man] (not yet translated into English) is recommended.
It says that if you practice a spiritual method without exactly knowing what you are doing might make the etheric body come unstuck from the astral and physical body what leads to external influences from negative energies and/or entities which could lead to the above-mentioned problems and diseases (mental and physical).

[Tapati]

There is also the possibility that practicing a religious method brings out some really bad traits in people; there are many pitfalls in spiritual life when there is no proper guidance based on insights, realizations and self-knowledge, as in Iskcon and SCS Math.

A few examples:

* to become so exalted that one forms an impossible dream of a perfect life;
* to become overzealous and then we may begin to criticize others and be lacking in basic human love;
* discover how many "mistakes" one has been making up to now, and one's natural desire is to be "correct." In the beginning one is probably going to be too artificially "strict" and make many new mistakes out of pride;
* becoming filled with the spirit of inflated self-esteem.]

For the esoterically-inclined Rudolf Steiner's "Welche bedeutung hat die okkulte Entwickelung des Menschen für seine Hülle (physisischer Leib, Aetherleib, Astralleib) und sein Selbst?" GA 145. [Effects of Occult Development on the Self and on the Sheaths of Man] (not yet translated into English) is recommended.
It says that if you practice a spiritual method without exactly knowing what you are doing might make the etheric body come unstuck from the astral and physical body what  leads to external influences from negative energies and/or entities which could lead to the above-mentioned problems and diseases (mental and physical).

I've fallen into all of those pits! Dark places indeed!

[Tapati]

Thanks, Dhyana, for the reference to Hanlon's razor, which led me on a journey to a wonderful list of laws named for people.

First, the Wikipedia link for Hanlon's Razor which mentioned a similar quote by Heinlein.

Then, the list of eponmymous laws, including the laws of robotics by Isaac Asimov, and Arthur C. Clarke's laws:

* First law: When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.
* Second law: The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.
* Third law: Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

[Strange Pilgrim]

The dysfunctional temple structure was hard enough for people who were sincere, for a non-believer on a mission of espionage, it would almost seem like an unlikely set of austerities to go through just to have a alibi to be legally in India. There are so many other groups to be a part of that would not impose such heavy lifestyle changes in order to put on a false front of legitimacy.

Not that I'm super arguing this intelligence agents theory, because I really don't know. But it seems like a lot of the big leaders, from what I've heard anyway, in fact didn't/don't follow the rigors of the religion. Behind closed doors they were doing drugs, screwing, going to movies, etc. And in the public sphere, well, vegetarianism, especially when you're eating ISKCON type cuisine, is easy. Dancing in kirtana is easy. Wearing swell clothes is easy (I always found wearing devotional clothes, neck beads, etc. glamorous and fun and a gratifying public display of how allegedly "spiritual" I am, and thought men looked great in kurtas and dhotis). Being surrounded by nubile, sari-clad (bare midriffed) girl-women floating around pretending to be ecstatic is easy. It seems to me that ISKCON would be a pretty sweet gig for an agent. One of the best. Everything looks, smells and tastes fantastic. And as for waking up for mangala-arati, when these guys get big-shotty enough they stop, even the guru ones (I understand that Jayapataka never goes, nor does he chant rounds). Some excuse is made. And hey, if you rise far enough in the structure to have "disciples" and start being worshipped, that must feel way good. Not too tough a life.

If you don't actually believe any of the gaudiya philosophy it's probably pretty easy to hang in the institution and exteriorly live that life for decades. If you do, like all of us who belong to this forum did at one time or to some extent or another still do, you are thrown into devastating psychological and spiritual crisis. It's the ones who believe in it that can't stay.

[Dhyana]

Thanks for the links, they make a delightful reading!

Found another favorite:
Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice. (Grey's Law)

[babu]

Just one, Hanlon's Razor:

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

oops! edic

(checked myself from going on a "stupid" tirade)

[Dhyana]

Your self-control is admirable, babu!

[evakurvan]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7qEVlgAwtv0


lol the ending

[Kalisurfer]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7qEVlgAwtv0


lol the ending

These video's confirm that John Joseph was a street hustler long before living in the temple, he just found a home away from home doing the Christmas marathon Santa Hustle while in ISKCON. The videos seem to imply that he is somewhat happy for scamming the women he speaks of in the parking lots of NYC, with them thinking he was some type of invalid with MS and him preying upon their sympathies or scarring their kids.

The punk rock ISCKON connection is truly a strange hybrid of practice and believes that merged and intermingled.

The title of his book should of been, "From Punk to Pukka and Back Again!"